Makeup!

Memo to Amanda Lynn: On your wedding day, it’s okay to splurge on hair and makeup that will make you look good, rather than whatever you did. I don’t know where your breasts will wind up when you’re older, but your cheekbones are going to be down around your navel by the time you’re 40. And the eyebrows? Jinkies.

In other commentary: Oh, Sturdy. Did you never learn the phrase “Deny, Deny, Deny” from any of the well-to-do politicos at any of the schools you pretended to attend? Seriously, you could have gotten away with this. Who’s Amanda Lynn going to believe, her husband-to-be or estranged relatives who are planning to steal from her husband-to-be? Knowing Amanda Lynn, probably some imaginary pixies who fly through the air and tell her to start doing jumping jacks or something, and that would be a net win for you.

Anyhow, this plotline is really petering out. I think the reason is that there have been too many elements introduced without much resolution to any of them. The Pye Boy Wacky Extortion Scheme, for example: Glorious concept, but it’s been utterly derailed by them becoming all noble. Sturdy’s parents had great potential with their stunning obliviousness to all matters of tact, but they never moved beyond simply being rude. In fact, they actively shut off an interesting plot option, by grudgingly accepting Amanda Lynn rather than making an effort to stand between the “love” between her and their beloved Sturdivant.

Even Sturdy’s two-timing hasn’t really played out all that excitingly. Perhaps some big dust-up is on its way, and I hope so, but even if it is, the effect will be muted by the fact that Amanda Lynn already caught Sturdy in the midst of his sister-attending ways.

Here’s hoping that either the energy returns or this plotline moves on quick.