I’d Check The Cat In Case

From 6/21/08:

Today, Joel is inadvertently a jackass. (Distinguishing him from the jackass pulling the cart, who is genetically a jackass. Joel probably is one genetically as well, but today it’s inadvertent.) Of course, Rufus deserves it, so Joel gets five cool points.

Unless he’s asking the question because he’s seen Kitty’s clearly blissed-out face (which Word auto-corrects to “blessed-out”, proving something nefarious). Yep, that Kitty’s tasted something human, whether it’s tongue or toenail or something midway between. I don’t like Kitty.

The Wisdom of Shut-Ins

From 6/20/08:

Poor, poor Rufus. He wastes a full week of his life, seven days, 168 hours, 10,080 minutes, and very nearly a crappy song from Rent waiting for an essentially worthless prize, and for his trouble he doesn’t even get it.

He’s so angry he temporarily demotes his phone from the place of honor on his nightstand to the floor. But then, he realizes that’s too harsh, so he moves it back. But just as a warning against future malfeasance, he leaves the drawer open and askew. That’ll learn it.

Meanwhile, Soulless Kitty has turned into soulless Pikachu, but “soulless Pikachu” is redundant and can just be called “Pikachu” or “stupid Japanese thing that consists of thousands of rules each made up seemingly on the spot.”

Yeah! Going Antisane will speak truth to the power that is Pokemon. Take that, Pokemon!

Holy Crap, Kitty Can Levitate

6/19/08:

I TOLD YOU! IT’S A WITCH!

Of course, Rufus can both break down a wooden door with just a key and split himself and his possessions into two bodies, so perhaps Kitty isn’t the only one.

Meanwhile, we discover that Rufus’s shack is built out of scrap wood and onomotopoea, which apparently is quite common in junkyards.

Thank Goodness Rufus Has No Answering Machine or Deadbolt

6/18/08:

… because if he did, we wouldn’t have a plot.

The phone call comes, as we knew it would. But poor Rufus, so noble in his rejection of technologies that normal people take for granted, keeps all his worldly possessions (namely, a phone) safe from nefarious phone thieves through the use of a bulky padlock, rather than the convenience and security of a professionally installed deadbolt. As a result, he’s about to miss the most impotent telephone call he’s ever received, apart from the time he accidentally called for phone sex with Dustin Diamond.

Kitty still has no soul, and fortunately for Rufus, cats with no soul have supernatural powers that will prevent any ill from befalling their owners. At least until such time as the cat can eat the owner and take his soul down to hell for eternal torment.

Now that should be a fun plotline.

Someone, Shoot The Great Pumpkin

From 6/17/08:

We get it, Scancarelli. You’ve seen “It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown.” And you’re able to up the lame factor by turning said pumpkin into a phone call.

Aw, who am I kidding? I can’t stay mad at you. Not when you give us lines like “Phooey t’yooey an’ yo’ sister tooey!” Methinks that’s going to be a strong contender for “Gasoline Alley Line of the Year.” So let’s just say that it’s the only part of this strip and ignore everything else. Cool?